Every flower deserves a chance to wilt

Every flower deserves a chance to wilt March 5, 2001. Monday Morning I really need to go now! I said, hoping to provoke a sense of urgency, after all a Nor’easter was on its way. Okay, give me one more minute, he said. I was almost certain he winked, though I can’t be sure, because I turned on my heels too fast to prove or rather to refute. The said wink, annoyed me, though I’m not convinced why?

Thirty minutes later, he was still talking on the telephone. I interrupted him “ I’m just going to go by myself” adding I’ll be fine. No! Wait! he barked. “ Let me call you back later, I need to run out” he said to whomever it was on the phone. I was almost to the door, when he said, “ I don’t want you driving in this, give me one more second. I sighed knowing far to well what his impression of a second was. I heard him lock the bathroom door. I glanced into the hallway mirror catching my reflection; quietly I asked, “ why do I put up with this?” my reflection was without an answer, so was I.

I moved in closer to the mirror, so to examine this image in which I cast. I was certain if I looked long & hard enough I would uncover that flaw within myself, that allowed for me to “ put up with all that I put up with. I calculated, then revised, deliberated & devised “ Patience certainly is NOT a Virtue” I conceded as I often do these days, by my own tendencies, tendency to endure. I quickly justified the moment in his defense, he was after all, concerned for me, he must care, he must worry, after all he insists on driving me, I should be grateful; I need to be more patient. He ran past me and up the stairs, I’d be right down he said. I offered a fleeting smile; I looked back to the mirror and noticed that my smile seemed to breed contempt. I constructed a more pleasing smile, trying to remain patient.

I opened the front door to take a look at what it was that he thought I was unable to maneuver in, “ Give me a break” I thought, this is nothing, I’ve driven in much worse conditions. Infact, I thought the longer I wait, the worse it gets, “ why doesn’t he think the same?” I remembered reading recently that Aries & Libra’s are complete opposites, within the last few years this has proved to be quite apparent. I wondered why it never seemed to be so obvious years back? Had I changed? Had he changed? Had we both changed?

He came running back down the stairs with a new shirt on, his hair looked wet. He paused as though to put his shoes on, then ran back into the kitchen, I followed, he grabbed his cell phone, his keys, his coat off the back of the chair. He went into the family room, turned off the television, the lights, checking the glass slider, mumbling something about the electric bill. Then announced “ My Money” as though he had just been pick-pocketted. I watched while as he was feeling his pockets as though they themselves were missing. I watched as he checked his coat pockets, then he walked into the kitchen, searching, lifting up the day’s newspaper, checking drawers, cabinets, finally he went into the laundry room. I walked out the door and into the car. As I was pulling down the driveway, he appeared on the front porch looking somewhat flabbergasted. You couldn’t wait? he yelled sounding clearly disjointed. I answered, I waited one hour and eighteen minutes, and then I winked as I pulled away, leaving him and my virtues behind.